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5 ways to regulate your system after a difficult session

Use these therapist coping skills to prevent being at a higher risk for burnout.

Meaningful as it is, working as a therapist can also be challenging work. Supporting your clients on their mental health journey can be emotional and sometimes stressful — which is why it’s so important for you to prioritize taking care of yourself. “In order to show up for our clients, we have to be able to show up for ourselves,” says licensed therapist and Austin, Texas, group practice owner Grace Dowd. 

Finding ways to cope after an intense session is especially important. If you wait until the end of the day to calm yourself down, your next client won’t get the best version of you, Dowd explains. And over time, with unresolved stress, you’ll be at a higher risk for burnout. 

Looking for some creative ways to self-soothe between sessions? Below, find five therapist coping skills and ways to ground yourself after a challenging client.

Create a cheat-sheet.

In a high-stress moment, it can be hard to navigate how to calm yourself down. To prevent that from happening, Dowd suggests creating a “cheat-sheet” with your favorite ways to de-stress. Whether you create a list on your phone or computer or print something out and keep it in your desk drawer until you need it, it can be helpful to have a menu of options when you’re feeling dysregulated.

Change scenery.

Sometimes, your body and mind need a break from the place where you experienced the emotional intensity. Depending on how much time you have between sessions, it may help to step outside the therapy space and do something calming. Try going outside for some deep breaths of fresh air or taking a lap around the office or your house to reset before seeing your next client.

Move your body.

If you’ve been dealing with a highly activated client, you may have absorbed their stressed-out energy. In those cases, Dowd says, a bit of physical activity can help you process the upset feelings happening in your body. Take a beat and do a few high knees or arm circles, or try a few gentle stretches along with a deep breathing exercise. When time permits, a quick walk up and down stairs can also help if that's accessible for you.

Do something familiar and comforting.

When you’re upset, familiar activities can feel comforting, which can help you regulate your mind and body. Pop in headphones and listen to one of your favorite songs, tune into a silly YouTube or TikTok video that makes you laugh, or call a loved one and talk about something totally unrelated to therapy.

Reach out for support.

In therapy, you’re responsible for offering support to others — but sometimes, you need a bit of support, too. A trusted, empathetic person can be a sounding board for your big feelings, along with validating whatever you’re experiencing. If you work in a group practice, take a minute or two to process with a colleague, or send a HIPAA-compliant voice note to a fellow therapist. 

Jotting down your feelings in a notebook or on the notes app of your phone can also help in a pinch. Then, when you have time, you can address your feelings later. “Knowing you’re not carrying the load alone can go a long way,” says Dowd.

Headway is a free service that makes it easier and more profitable for therapists and psychiatrists to accept insurance.

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